the perfect guy?

When I last posted here on 5/14, i pondered if I would be able to get back to this on a relatively frequent basis. Hmm, it's been 10 days...not too frequent, huh?! ;) But it seems like life has been busy, for one reason or another, and it's taken me this long to get back.

I guess the reason I felt compelled to "pen" something here comes from a conversation I had with a long-distance girlfriend of mine. We chatted the other day about men in general, men in the dating scene, men in both casual as well as serious relationships. Both of us have had our share of marriage failures, relationship mishaps, and downright rotten dates. But we talked about what we felt were the high points, what in certain men made us feel really special, really loved...what made certain men stand out from all the other joe's in the crowd. She had her list and I had mine, and we did some comparing. There were some similarities, and then there were what I'll call "customized traits"...things the guy would say or do that was said or done because it pertained specifically to me, not just any other gal.

So, like, what was so damned great that stood out anyway??! Aah, I will tell you. And don't laugh...these things apparently made a big enough impression on me that I remember them now and they still make me smile! I was in a relationship with a man a few years back that for one reason or another, had certain fatal flaws that kept it from continuing. But we knew each other for a good long while, and he saw me at my best and at my worst. And no matter how crummy I felt or how that translated into how I looked (as in not so great), he would still look at me and tell me I was beautiful. And when I would look at him and laugh, and say, "yeah, right!", he would tell me that I was beautiful to him every second of every day. Wow, how great does that make you feel?? Pretty great! He also told me that his favorite vision of me was waking up next to me one morning, and seeing my hair spread across my pillow (i had very long hair at that time) and watching me sleeping...it was a moment he loved. Now to be honest, I had to have been lying there with my mouth hanging open, "mouth breathing" while I slept and possibly even snoring (how attractive)...but this man thought I was beautiful at that moment. If that doesn't make you go all soft & gooey inside, what does???!!! The fact that he chose to share with me, tell me how much he loved that moment...wow.

I guess it comes down to the fact that we, as women, just want to be loved, love to be admired by our man, and adore it when they say & do things that make us feel special. And it goes both ways!! It is our job, as women in a relationship, to make our guy feel incredibly special too...in little ways, big ways, whatever ways work. Because this cold, cruel world deals us enough shitty hands to begin with. The people we love & care about deserve to hear and see and feel from us the things that can "make their day". Isn't that what life is all about, anyway? It doesn't take money, fancy gifts, any of that stuff. It just takes a kind, loving word; a special gesture; a look that says, "you rock my world." It's that easy.

Make someone special in your life feel awesome today. What better feeling can you get for yourself, too, that's free?!

Keep on breathin' everyone...and have a great week!

Luv ya--
daffodil

yeah, i guess i'm back....here

Back in February...to be exact on February 11th, 2006, i posted here...thought I'd post on a regular basis...but i didn't. So, it's now May 8th, 2006...thought i'd post again...not sure why i felt i needed to...but just thought i might.

Soooo, here we are...it's spring of 2006. I've had a ton of changes in my life since i last posted. How shall I wax eloquently on it all??? Not sure I need to do so. But i guess i'll try to wrap my arms around things that have happened in the last few months. Wow, that's an arm-full! Since I last posted, i met a very nice guy. Just sort of happened...out of nowhere. Didn't really expect anything like this. But it happened. It's so weird, you know, when you least expect it, things can happen. So yeah, i met this guy, and it's funny, because I was really happy with my world as it was. Sort of happy with my little "independent world" that I had created for myself. You know, when you're on your own, you make your time mean something, i guess. You fill your fill your time with friends, with your weekly TV prime-time schedule, you settle down and feel that things are okay. Then someone comes into your life and everything changes. Your schedule changes, your weekly routine changes, your expectations change. And then, boom! Everything is different. Is it a good change? Yes, it's good. It feels comfortable, it feels like maybe it's okay for things to change. Was there really that big of a void that i needed to fill? Yeah, I think there was. All I know, is that i like how that void has been filled.

I also know that i like my independent time, too. I like being by myself...is that a result of being on my own for a number of years??? Probably. It's an internal battle...not really a battle...hmm, that's not really a good word for it. But it's just a change, and i'm not opposed to change. It's nice feeling like there's someone who cares enough about me to know what's going on for me each day. That's pretty cool, actually. I guess with all that's happened to me in the last couple of years, well I'm a little cautious. A little concerned with turning over too much of myself. We'll have to see. For right now, I'm pretty happy. Pretty "comfortable"...is that the right word? I guess we'll see on that too. But for now, I'm good with going with the flow.

And while I felt a need to put some of these thoughts down, i also realize that it's almost 11:00 on a Monday night, and I need to put myself in bed and get to sleep. So, I'm gonna do that. But i'll add to this perhaps tomorrow. And then perhaps the next day, and maybe I'll get back to this "online journal" and see how it goes. In the meantime, life is good...life feels right...life as a single girl at 47 ain't all that bad. Smile!!

And looking back at previous posts, and thinking now ahead...well, as i've said before--keep on breathin' everyone! And be glad you wake up breathin' each and every day!

Love to all--

Daffodil